THE 6 MOST ANNOYING THINGS IN THE WORLD... LAST SATURDAY

I was obligated to attend my 8 year-old's soccer prize-giving ceremony last Saturday morning. While that in itself wasn't overly annoying (although, having to do ANYTHING on a Saturday morning peeves slightly), you won't believe what happened while it happened...

1: The couple sitting next to me brought a 2 year-old. This is unforgivable. If you're that committed to your kid that both parents have to be there, farm the younger one off to a relative. Get a sitter. Leave it at the MacDonalds playground for an hour. Do SOMETHING dammit. I'd rather adopt my kid out than force it to sit through something as boring as a prize-giving.

2: The same couple fed the kid CRISPY NOODLES to keep it happy. This is almost worthy of a double entry. Due to their crispiness, the noodles themselves are a loud enough snack as it is, however, these particular noodles seemed to be in a very large FOIL BAG. I guess that seals in the freshness but NOT THE DECIBELS!

3: Someone left their phone on. Guess who? That's right, the mother of the toddler sitting next to me, the toddler now smearing half-chewed crispy noodles all over my right sleeve. Why do people who leave their phones on always choose that "authentic, old-style ringing phone" ring tone. Munters.

4: She answered it. I'm not kidding. Right there, in the middle of the prize-giving, while they were handing out awards, she answered the phone and had an actual conversation. Out loud. (Pointless trying to whisper into a phone, I suppose. It'd be annoying if the person on the other end of the line couldn't hear you AS CLEARLY AS WE CAN)

5: Calling out "Go Jaydyn!" when Jaydyn's team is summoned to the stage to accept their awards. Luckily for the couple sitting next to me, Jaydyn wasn't THEIR older kid and they weren't doing the calling out, otherwise there may have been violence. I don't know if that's how you spell Jaydyn, but I certainly find the two Y's annoying, don't you?

6: Leaving early as soon as your child has their certificate. This is just bad manners. If everybody did this, there would only be one set of parents left at the end. These are probably the same kind of people who enter lifts before the people inside can get out. There's no excuse for that kind of behaviour. Oh, by the way, yes, it was the couple sitting next to me. Good riddance... and take your crispy, full-noise noodles with you.